Infatuation, Lust or Love? By Dr. Marie-France Hankinson

Infatuation, Lust or Love? By Dr. Marie-France Hankinson By Dr. Marie-France Hankinson Email this article Printer friendly page comments to the editor International counsellor, a doctor of Metaphysics, and PhD. in Complimentary, Alternative and Preventative Therapies, including Transpersonal Psychology and Relationship Dynamics. She is now working across the Atlantic. Aug 11, 2006, 09:57

This month we are investigating the physical love, the expression of our root energy. Many of us spend lifetimes looking for Love and all the attributes that come with it: Attraction, Intimacy, Passion, Ecstasy, Conscious loving, Lasting love, Comforting togetherness .... Little do we know that the search for a soul mate can be enormously challenging. Very often our expectations and requirements are out of alignment with who we really are. Sometimes we even get a sense of frustration, dissatisfaction and disappointment while trying to find the right partner and our one true love. But yet we never cease to hope and wish for it! Most of the time we are more in love with the IDEA of "being in love" than being "truly in love." What should we do? The first approach is rather basic and very simple! We all go through it to experience the learning process of mastering love. At some point, choices are made to make it physical. It all begins with the body language that is leading to a sexual encounter. Our society puts importance on physical intimacy as the greatest sharing one can experience. That is not necessarily true. In their search for love, people who repeatedly have numerous sex partners are usually left with a sense of hunger and a lack of inner fulfilment. But it is easy to confuse sex for love. Throughout history, a sense of shame and guilt has somehow been implanted in our minds, whether we are aware of it or not. There are still places in the world where sexual doctrines dictate lethal punishment for expressions of sexuality. This doesn't make any sense since life begins with sex (listen to podcast interview about sex and spirituality). Without it, none of us would be here. We all know, however, that sexual energy is regarded as an important and powerful force within. Our attitude and experience about it is influences our quality of life in both positive and negative ways. I have met people who have experienced sexual trauma and who suffer from it for the rest of their lives. It is, however, such a privilege to help them. Often we encounter situations where sexual feelings are not reciprocated and we don't have the skills to handle such circumstances. Sex can be used to cause harm, as a means of controlling others or inflating the ego. It can also become an absorbing addiction that leads to a disconnection from the essence of all human relationships. Until we really understand who we are and learn to love ourselves, we continue to repeat the same pattern looking for approval and acceptance everywhere. In which category would you place yourself? Are you still searching for love: -- in the right places? -- In the wrong ones? Have you learned your lessons of love? Do you feel comfortable enough with yourself so that you don't have to run looking for somebody else . over and over? In the end, who are you? Passionate or Passive Positive or Negative Animalistic or Reserved Exalted or Shy Majestic or Masochistic Sacred or Diabolic Or - much more . Maybe you can find who you are in matters of love. I hope you do. Have you enjoyed reading this article about physical love that I call "The Human Technique".